Jacob Lund / Canva Pro
Cheating is never okay, nor is it ever the answer to your problems. We all know that “cheating” is wrong but are there ever circumstances where it’s justified? Most of you would say no but then the least you can is take the time to understand why someone would do it.
We tend to assume that a cheater is usually a man, a player who has no remorse and doesn’t care about anyone but himself. Yet, sometimes the cheater is a woman, even a kind loving woman that no one would ever suspect. So what reason would such a woman ever have to cheat? Let’s find out!
For more great relationship advice and tips on how to attain the kind of love you deserve, watch this video from expert Amy North: Click Here To Watch The Full Video.
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“Wasn’t happy with my partner. He didn’t give me the attention—mentally, emotionally, or physically—that I needed. I loved him, but I felt like he kept me around to pass the time. My best friend, though, he gave me all the attention I needed and made me feel like the sexiest woman in the world.” – Weekendoffender
You can be around a person all the time and still feel completely unseen. This can start to break a person from the inside and make them feel like they don’t even matter, or like they aren’t worth anything. So when somebody finally makes them feel deserving, it’s easy to seek that feeling out.
Womanizer Toys / Unsplash
Womanizer Toys / Unsplash
“For me, it was mostly because I love that intense energy that comes from clicking with someone new. No matter how many other wonderful things you can get from a long-term relationship, you’ll never again get that delirious feeling of first falling for someone once you’re married. And the reason I let it get as far as it did is that it’s pretty similar to making a new friend, only you also want to rip their clothes off, and there’s the deeply flattering knowledge that they feel the same way about you.
I hadn’t seen my husband for a month at that point, and it was in a foreign country where there was truly no chance in hell he would ever find out, which was also tempting. Also, this was one of the most beautiful men I’ve ever met… hoo boy. I knew exactly where the boundary was that mustn’t be crossed, until one night I did nothing…” t0ss0ff / Reddit
Bruno van der Kraan / Unsplash
Bruno van der Kraan / Unsplash
“I used to have a bad habit of letting relationships drag on far past their emotional end. I would fall out of love with these men, but I didn’t realize it until I had fallen for someone else, and by that time I was contemptuous and disillusioned enough with the relationship that I didn’t really care how it made the guy I was dating feel. I would end up kissing the new guy, and breaking up with the old guy immediately after.
Essentially the cheating served as the catalyst for ending a relationship. I finally recognized this habit, and now I pay more attention to how I feel in a relationship and break it off once it’s clearly over instead of hanging on out of routine and comfort.” – Unknown
When in doubt just at least be honest with your partner, it’s the least that you owe them. That way if you can’t get past your doubts then at least they’re not blindsided.
Claudia van Zyl / Unsplash
Claudia van Zyl / Unsplash
‘I had a crazy boyfriend who attempted to control me from afar. If he didn’t know what I was doing or where I was 24/7, he would spam call me, and ‘like’ comments/photos/etc on Facebook and message my friends. In addition, he was a loser who lived at home with his mom with no job, while I was working and going to school. I always had to drive to him (an hour + drive) because he had no money and no car. I broke up with him several times, only to get suckered back in because he would threaten.
Basically, his controlling attitude drove me to cheat on him. I have nightmares about him still.” – pewpton / Reddit
Be careful of toxic relationships and the way they change you as a person as they have the power to make you someone you’re not.
Maksym Tymchyk / Unsplash
Maksym Tymchyk / Unsplash
“I was afraid. There was serious talk of him, my now ex, taking up a new job and moving to NYC. He wanted me to come with him. This meant I left my comfy and awesome job in a smallish town, to the unknown in a very large busy city. I was only 20 at the time.
For the two weeks, he spent in NYC scoping out the place and working in his potential new position I cheated. I really can’t come up with a better reason other than fear. There was no emotional attachment to the guy I saw. It was just sex. When my ex returned I told him what happened and explained how I felt. He was pissed of course, but we worked through it and he didn’t take the job in NYC. I’ve stopped dealing with fear in such a poor manner now.” – megandharma
Remember that after all we’re all human and we make mistakes what matters is how we deal with those mistakes and what we learn from them.
Do you want to learn a secret technique anyone can master that will make someone fall in love with you?
Yuris Alhumaydy / Unsplash
Yuris Alhumaydy / Unsplash
“I cheated on my ex because I was in a very serious relationship way too young and did not know how to act. For me, personally, I needed to go out and explore myself and even in different relationship dynamics. I couldn’t find this in my partner and took the easy way out. It was a confusing time in my adult life, as he was my best friend and we had no real issues. I was just not romantically in love with him.” – idontswearsweatpants
Mistakes are also part of growing up. Although being young doesn’t justify cheating, it can still serve as a lesson rather than trigger a pattern of cheating.
Pixabay / Pexels
Pixabay / Pexels
“I was happy in my relationship, completely in love, but for some reason I had a nagging thought of ‘what if I had been with this other guy?’ The other guy was a friend, and we had feelings back and forth for a while. The curiosity got to me in a weak moment, and we got together once. Frankly, the sex wasn’t that great, probably because the whole situation felt wrong to me.
I regretted it immediately and felt horribly guilty. I eventually broke up with my boyfriend and told him about the cheating. We later got past it and got back together. Today, I do not regret it. If nothing else, it taught me how important my relationship was. It also taught me how horrible I felt betraying someone I love.” tr33hugger20 / Reddit
“In my case, my relationship was already over in my mind. I’d fallen in love with someone else and planned to break up with my boyfriend. I just wanted to wait until after the holidays—they were always hard for him and his family because his mother died around that time several years before. I didn’t want him to have to deal with all of that and a breakup.
“But things moved way faster than expected with the other guy. I still feel awful about it. I should have either waited or broken up with my boyfriend before anything happened. I broke up with him the very next day.” – DiMyDarling
The thing is there is never going to be a “right” time to break someone’s heart and let them go. However the sooner the better, because the quicker you do it, the sooner they can begin their healing and everyone can start working again towards finding happiness.
Kinga Cichewicz / Unsplash
Kinga Cichewicz / Unsplash
“I did it because I was going through anxiety hell and was looking to feel anything, because I couldn’t feel a single thing. My husband was fine with going along with things the way they were. I never told him. I love him very much and once I realized what I had done, I vowed I’d never to do it again.” – Unknown
Dealing with any sort of mental health can take over the mind, the body, and thoughts. It can be a really dark time for people and make them feel like they can’t even act like themselves. It’s important to seek help during those times and learn healthy coping mechanisms in order to prevent of self-sabotaging cycles.
Andrik Langfield / Pexels
Andrik Langfield / Pexels
“I was selfish and insecure and liked the male attention I was suddenly getting. Also, we were long-distance, and I had just started university and wanted to experiment with other people. He didn’t do anything to push me to cheat. To this day, I feel so guilty for having done it, but at the same time, I think it was a good learning experience for me.” – jack_hugeman
The moral of the story is that cheating is never “okay” or “justified” but that it doesn’t automatically make someone a “bad” person. It happens to the best of us and it has consequences but what matters is how we grow from it.
We don’t blame you for being frustrated with dating and wanting to stick with what’s comfortable but if you’re struggling to find and keep a quality relationship click here to find out how to break the cycle.
For more great relationship advice and tips on how to attain the kind of love you deserve, watch this video from expert, Amy North: Click Here To Watch The Full Video.
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