The 4 Stages Of Love And Why Too Many Get Stuck At Stage 3

1. Falling in love.

They call this the honeymoon stage sometimes. It’s where everything is so amazing. You’re getting to know one another, learning all the little details, and falling in love more every day. The love is great. The sex is great. Every day is exhilarating. This is truly the easiest part of being in love.

Related: 5 Signs You Aren’t Ready For A Real Relationship

2. Being a couple.

After falling in love, things calm down a little bit. You become a little more domestic. You’ve likely committed to one another monogamously at this point and have deactivated the Tinder and OkCupid accounts. This is the part where you’re building a life together, and here’s a secret:

It can be as fun as you want it to be.

Building that life can be mundane and dull or it can be exciting and fun. It really is a decision that you make. But often times, we end up in stage 3.

3. Disillusionment.

This is the stage where most relationships go to die. It can come on slowly or be sudden. During stage three, we can be angry or withdrawn when hurt. We can feel trapped in the relationship. You don’t want to give up, but yet you find yourself doing things you didn’t think you’d ever do.

Maybe that OkCupid account gets reactivated for a day. Maybe you find your eyes drifting toward one of your coworkers. But how you handle this stage really sets the stage for the rest of your life together. It takes work to be the best person you can be for your partner. What will you choose?

4. Real love.

If you make it through disillusionment, stage four is for keeps. By confronting these major issues with your relationship, you build a foundation for the rest of your life together. The wounds heal, alliances are rebuilt, and true, intense love flourishes.