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It's never as black and white as a good wife and a bad wife. A good wife isn't a woman who only says yes, aims to please her husband, and has to sacrifice her own needs and happiness for her husband and children. However, a good wife is someone who listens, supports, loves herself, put in the effort, and is open to growth.
On the other hand, a bad wife can be summed up in six characteristics. According to men, here are the six warning signs that they know to avoid in women. If you notice any of these characteristics, she's definitely not wifey material. Continue clicking through this list to get the insight and to find out more!
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This might be an obvious one. It's one thing never being able to chose what to order for dinner, but having commitment issues is not limited to the relationship. Commitment is a promise to consistently dedicate time and effort to something of value. This includes her hobbies, lifestyle, health, job, friendships, and choices.
If she can't commit to plans next week, and is flaky in her own choices, then how will she commit to marriage, the commitment of a lifetime? She needs to show consistency through the good and bad, and be able to see things through, not giving up at the first chance.
Keep in mind that according to a statewide survey conducted in Oklahoma, it was found that one of the biggest reasons for divorce is commitment (85%), followed by arguing (61%).
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A woman who pushes to grow and keeps you motivated to keep on moving forward is the best kind of teammate to have. However, she's different from a woman who is always trying to change you.
If she truly loves you, she'll love you for who you are and trust you to work on the parts of yourself that you want to improve. She wouldn't nag, critique you and make you feel bad yourself. Doing so would be controlling and a projection of her own insecurities and vanity. You should feel like you're enough.
Nobody is always right. A mature woman knows when she can use an opportunity where she was wrong to not only admit it but learn from it There's nothing bad about being wrong sometimes, that's how we learn how to do and be better.
It sometimes requires something setting aside our dignity to take accountability for ourselves and make sure the people we care about feel respected, heard, and loved. If she throws a tantrum every time she's wrong so the tables turn then she's not ready for a serious commitment.
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We all have trusted only to get burned and this can make us feel guarded. While it's natural to put up walls to protect ourselves, it shouldn't make us always assume the worst.
A woman who was hurt so badly that she can't trust you to leave the house without you texting her the play-by-play of your day still needs time to heal alone. While trust should be earned it's also the foundation of a lasting and healthy relationship. With it missing, the relationship will always be on shaky grounds.
Spending time together is great but needing you as her sole source of happiness is too much pressure and bound to break the relationship. Her mood shouldn't be entirely bound to you. Wanting to monopolize all of your time will create a codependent relationship where you will both lose yourselves and forget who you are without the relationship.
A co-dependent relationship will affect other important areas of your life, like your friendships or your work. Plus too much of a good thing, like spending too much time together, will get you on each other's nerves. You should be able to have your independent hobbies and relationships.
It doesn't matter if you've been together for two months or twelve years, you should be taking the time to appreciate the small things. You don't lose your importance to one another just because you've spent a lot of time together.
In a relationship, small things like saying thank you make the other person feel seen. When that's lost, they lose faith in the relationship altogether. If she can't acknowledge the effort you put in to make her happy, then she'll be too entitled to put it in equally on her end.
We all have our pasts and have encountered hardships. This shouldn't be diminished. There's no denying that bad experiences have had an impact on us. However, there is a difference between being a victim and playing the victim. A person shouldn't be defined by their past when they're capable of taking control of their present and future.
If she uses her past to justify her bad behavior, doesn't work through her insecurities, and projects it onto you, then she's not taking accountability. This means that arguments will always be your fault, and she'll never learn to take responsibility for herself.
The whole saying 'happy wife and happy life" is not part of a healthy foundation for marriage. It creates un an equal power dynamic, where a husband's needs don't matter. It divides the couples with resentment. In any relationship, always look at how you feel and ask yourself: does this person make you love yourself more? Do you want to grow old with them?
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