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Try as we might, it's near impossible to correctly and fully identify the people around us with less-than-ideal motives. These types of manipulators are experts at putting on a front, but there are always tells, traits they can't quite erase that mark them as being untrustworthy.
By keeping a vigilant eye, you can identify these traits in people and know immediately to keep them at arm's length, protecting your peace of mind in the process. Keep reading through this list to learn what to look out for. Have you spotted any of these signs before?
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Giving someone your complete and total trust is very intimate, no matter the type of relationship you hold with them. Though some people trust others easily, it's still an honor to know that someone believes you to be good enough to grant you the title of trustworthy.
But how do you judge if someone else is trustworthy? It actually might be easier to identify the warning signs that someone's not trustworthy, some of which are listed below.
A clear indication of unreliability is when someone frequently fails to meet your gaze. Extensive research reveals that individuals who evade eye contact are perceived as less dependable compared to those who confidently maintain eye contact.
This could be attributed to the fact that sustaining eye contact reflects integrity and transparency, important qualities to those who value politeness and social astuteness. By keeping one's eyes locked, trust is strengthened between two people, and others will feel more connected to you when you speak.
Then there are those who don't even try to mask their lying, or they get found out after a long string of lies and obliterate their chances of ever being considered trustworthy again.
Blatant dishonesty is perhaps the most obvious of the red flags on this list, but there are still some who overlook it, claiming it to be part of the liar's personality or downplaying how much of a breach of trust their lies are. You don't have to put up with someone who's constantly making things up, no matter their reason, as protecting your peace of mind will always be more important.
Inconsistent behavior often manifests in someone acting extremely different depending on who they're around. Now, many people do this naturally, but it only becomes an issue when these changes in personality are done in order to manipulate others or climb a social ladder for personal gain.
If someone behaves entirely differently around someone new, who's to say they don't do it to you? Do they use their real personality around you, or are you just seeing another faux persona? It can become hard to trust anything they do once you're aware of their many faces.
People who lack empathy may be worth watching out for, as their inability to connect with the emotions of others can make them more likely to engage in behavior some may find unethical or manipulative.
Now, low empathy isn't an immediate indicator that someone is untrustworthy, as there are plenty of people who function just fine and build strong relationships. It's worth watching out for, though, especially if you're already aware that something seems to be afoot.
Being able to read body language is an incredible skill, as it can tell you so much about any new person or situation. You'll be able to see the true intentions of whoever you're with so long as you keep a vigilant eye.
Things like defensively crossed arms, frequent foot tapping, constant posture changes, and fidgeting can all be indicators that someone's lying. Watching for these behaviors can help you sense when something's amiss and be one step ahead of the person spinning mistruths.
Someone who's so unable to see their own faults that they can't even take accountability when they've done something wrong is not someone you want to be trusting. It's clear that they're blind to their own actions or maybe even more willing to push the fault onto someone else just to evade consequences.
Having someone like this around isn't advised, because even if they're very kind to you, you can never truly know if you'll be the next person taking the blame for their mistake.
Someone being entirely focused on their own wants over the needs of their peers is also a red flag in regard to how much you should trust them. Since they're so concerned with their desires, seemingly willing to do anything to achieve them, there's no guarantee that you won't be one of many people they screw over on the road to their success.
Not only should you be wary around these people as a means of protecting your trust, but you should be sure to protect your peace of mind too. You'll feel better and become less likely to be a pawn if you carry yourself with confidence.
What about someone who's already reached those goals they were striving for? If you find someone that brags excessively about their accomplishments, or even worse, someone who brags about the terrible things they did to reach those accomplishments, you'll want to steer clear of them whenever possible.
Not only are they already displaying a total disregard for other people by being proud of their back-stabbing actions, but they're more concerned with their own perceived skills than they are with virtues like honesty.
Now, we all like to indulge in a little gossip from time to time. There's no shame in that! It's fun to be a little catty with your close friends about a coworker you dislike or a common friend group enemy. It's fun, and it builds deeper connections with those you share this info with.
It's when gossip is all someone is able to talk about that it becomes a problem. It can be a sign that they're the type to spread rumors, even untrue ones, just to have more drama to discuss, and that's not someone you want to trust with your secrets.
If someone you know is constantly dropping the ball, showing up late, or not keeping promises they made, you might need to reconsider whether or not it's worth it to continue placing trust in them.
They may be the sweetest person you know, as not being trustworthy doesn't always equate to cruelty or bad intentions. It just means they can't fulfill commitments they make, a lesson they'll have to learn once you start to pull away.
No one is able to fully and accurately predict who in your life is going to wind up betraying you. Even if someone shows every sign on this list, there's no guarantee that they're mishandling your trust or even that they're a bad person.
That doesn't mean that keeping these traits in mind when meeting someone new isn't worth it. Being able to see a lie coming from a mile away and calling it out when it happens is unmatched in how powerful it can make you feel, and you deserve to not only reclaim your strength but protect yourself from heartbreak too.
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