We all have moments where we doubt ourselves; none of us are perfect or confident one hundred percent of the time. For some, though, 'doubt' grows into a much bigger, uglier problem, one that can drag a person down under the waters of self-hate.
This is known as imposter syndrome, and it affects more people than you might know. Those with imposter syndrome often have certain habits, tells that give away the state of their confidence, try as they might to hide it from others.
Constantly having the dark cloud of insecurity looming over you is no way to live. You can change that starting today.
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Imposter syndrome is a struggle that many people face, often without anyone else knowing. It's a psychological pattern where people doubt themselves in every aspect despite visible, tangible success. They believe they're lesser than, undeserving, or any other negative feelings that stem from doubt.
Because of this mindset, they form a lot of habits, habits that do nothing but keep them trapped under the stress that imposter syndrome brings. By recognizing these habits in yourself, you can take the first step toward changing them.
People who secretly struggle with imposter syndrome often overwork themselves in an attempt to prove their worth and competence. They feel the need to go above and beyond in their tasks, believing that only by working harder than everyone else can they mask their perceived inadequacies.
Overworking can also manifest in taking on more responsibilities than they can handle. They might volunteer for additional projects or stay late at work, all in an effort to prove their value. This habit can lead to burnout as they continuously push themselves to meet unrealistic standards.
Another common habit among those with imposter syndrome is downplaying their achievements and successes. They often attribute their accomplishments to luck, timing, or external factors rather than acknowledging their own skills and efforts.
When praised or recognized for their work, they might respond with phrases like "It was nothing" or "I just got lucky." This habit not only diminishes their self-esteem but also affects how others perceive their capabilities. This self-deprecation prevents them from fully enjoying their successes and reinforces their feelings of inadequacy.
People struggling with imposter syndrome frequently seek validation and reassurance from others. They rely on external affirmation to feel confident about their abilities, potential, and decisions. This stems from their deep-seated fear of being exposed as a fraud, even though they aren't, making them dependent on others' opinions to validate their worth.
This need for constant reassurance can strain relationships and create a cycle of dependency that drains everyone involved. They might frequently ask for feedback, second opinions, praise, and confirmation, always doubting their own judgment and capabilities. While seeking validation can provide temporary relief, it ultimately reinforces their insecurities and prevents them from developing self-confidence.
Another common habit among those with imposter syndrome is comparing themselves unfavorably to their peers. They often believe that others are more competent, successful, or deserving than they are, even if they're on the same level of skill as the other person. No matter what, they always see themselves as worse.
These comparisons can be particularly damaging, as they ignore their unique strengths while also pitting themselves against others, even those they love. This habit can lead to feelings of envy, frustration, and a diminished sense of self-worth, further entrenching their lack of confidence.
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People with imposter syndrome often avoid new challenges and opportunities due to a fear of failure. They worry that taking on something new will expose their perceived incompetence, leading to embarrassment, criticism, or worsened reputation. This habit limits their growth, preventing them from reaching their full potential.
Avoiding challenges can also mean missing out on valuable experiences and opportunities for advancement. They might turn down promotions, avoid public speaking, or shy away from leadership roles, all because of their fear of being 'exposed.'
Overpreparing and overanalyzing every task and decision is another habit common among those with imposter syndrome. They feel the need to meticulously plan and scrutinize every detail to avoid making mistakes and facing backlash for it. This habit can lead to procrastination and inefficiency, as they spend excessive time on tasks that could be completed more quickly.
This overpreparation stems from their fear of failure and desire to meet unrealistic standards. They might create extremely detailed plans, conduct extensive research, or seek multiple opinions before making a decision. While thoroughness can be beneficial, this habit often leads to unnecessary stress that hinders their confidence.
Imposter syndrome can bleed into every area of one's life. From work, to home, to friends, to fun, everything can be tainted by the feelings that imposter syndrome instills in one's mind. It's pervasive, tough, and all-encompassing.
But it's not unbeatable, not impossible to overcome or change. You can defeat imposter syndrome. With a strong support network, a professional's help, and endless kindness toward yourself, you can come to see how much value you have and the joy that you bring to the world.
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